Tuesday, February 08, 2005

Office Speak

OFFICE-SPEAK - What people in YOUR office say and what they really mean


I’ll get on to that right away
Go away, I’m in the middle of surfing the net

I left a message for X last week
I forgot to ring X; I’ll ring them now

I’ll chase him up
I’ll ring him

The e-mail server was down
I didn’t send that e-mail

X is dealing with that
I’ve forgotten all about it; as soon as you leave the room I’ll tell X to do it

I’m working on it as we speak
I’m trying to remember what the hell it was you asked me to do

I know the perfect person for the job
I don’t want to do your crappy task; I don’t like X so get them to do it

Sorry I missed your call, I was on the other line
I’m deliberately avoiding your calls

I took an early lunch
I bunked off early

I took a late lunch
I spent 2 1/2 hours at the shops

I’m working from home
I’m watching Trisha

I’m really excited about this
I couldn’t care less about this

Let’s toss some ideas about
I’ve no idea what to do and I want you to do all the hard work

Did you not get my memo?
I’d better do a memo

The goods are stuck in transit
I didn’t order them

I think I met them at the Christmas Party
We had a snog and a good grope in the stationery cupboard

I don’t think they’d be right for this office
I’ve slept with them
Thanks to Andrew Smith for this!!!

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