Friday's answer
8: four children (2 boys and 2 girls), their mother and father, the mother's mother, and the father's father. Final scoreboard will be announced at 5.00!!!
Susan
Oh Susan!!!
This is our Susan with me, Freddy at the wedding of her and Richard. She looked so beautiful that day and it was one of the nicest days of my life. Please Susan - Please come and have a laugh with us, your best friends in the world!!
Fred and Fred
Labels: Susan
Susan Hunter Campbell
As we all know there is an event tonight taking place in the Hillsborough direction.Susan Hunter Campbell has been invited but she insists that she would not fit in with the "Guys"Could you all leave messages or comments insisting that she attends this worthy evening. Perhaps we can sway her and change her mind???Fred XXLabels: Susan
Friday's 10am Quizler
A
Sandy Row family photo contained:
one grandfather, one grandmother,
two fathers, two mothers,
six children, four grandchildren,
two brothers, two sisters,
three sons, three daughters,
one father-in-law, one mother-in-law, one daughter-in-law
29 people you may think, but no, what is the least number of people here? (photo above is an illustration only - do not count the people in this photo!!!)
Remember, to answer, you send an e-mail to mark.mcguire@btinternet.com with the answer and then post a comment "I'm in" so I can log your time.... Labels: photos
Word Verification
I've had to do it....
I didn't want to
But they've beaten me.
You've probably seen adverts for things appear as comments from time to time - people selling anything from Hoovers to chewing gum. They say things like "Great blog - I have a blog about
TOOTH WHITENING - Do you need
TEETH WHITENING?? I know I do!!"
Etc
Etc
I normally remove these comments so as not to trouble you all but recently I have found I remove on average about 6!! I'm going to deliberately not remove the ones on this post just to let you see the extent of the problem...
SOOOOO I am going to turn on from later today "Word Verification" - somehow this stops this happening. It means that if you leave a comment you will have to type in a word as well to verify you. Sorry about this but it will stop it all happening and save my frustration.....
M XX
Thursday's quizler
The answer was of course, you can't take a picture with a wooden leg. Scores to follow!!M
X Factor Update
X Factor winner Steve Brookstein is singing in a
wine bar in
Reigate, Surrey, called Tickled Ivory.Labels: X Factor
Another one for Andrew Smith
http://www.shopcat.com/
Message from Alan in Edinburgh for y'all!!
Message from Alan in Edinburgh for y'all!!
Hi Mark! Loved the limericks by everyone... I'm not intelligent enough to come up with one lol. How's Belfast? - work? choir? other Freddy etc. Still loving Edinburgh- music course is class and everything else is awesome! Was off yesterday and today so its good - the course isnt too demanding yet. Chamber choir is class- singing Exsultate Justi, loads of Palestrina, Bach, Allegri Miserere and so much other cracker music! Loving your websites btw!
Labels: Alan C, limericks
Thursday's Quizler - submitted by Diageo
Today's quizler has been submitted by Jonny Diageo meaning he cannot enter today. I can however....In Okmulgee, Oklahoma, you cannot take a picture of a man with a wooden leg. Why not?
Gina
Poor Gina!! Because she is in a different time zone she came in late - I'll give her 4 points for her Limerick!! (as follows)
In Belfast for two days this week
There's a summit on Toilet Technique
It's luxurious meester
To set down your keester
In East Lothian's loos - magnifique!
Labels: limericks
Scores for Wednesday
Isla unquestionably is the winner with her fecal conjectures....
Isla 5 points
Jonny 4.5 points
Sandra 4 points
Richard 3 points
Susan 3 points
Walker 3 points
Lisa 2 points
Seriously people this was fantastic and so hard to choose - well done everyone....will we make Wednesday Limerick day???
Labels: limericks, Susan
Your Limericks!!!
What a day!! Your entries were fantastic - big pat on the back for all of you !! I was quite bowled over by the standard of these.In no particular order here they are........In Belfast for two days this week
There's a summit on "Toilet Technique"
The bowl often white,
The main input shite,
Depository Perfection they seek Jonny RobertsIn Belfast for two days this week
There's a summit on "Toilet Technique"
If you go for colonic
Your bowels will be harmonic
But make sure the tube doesn't leakSusan Hunter CampbellIn Belfast for two days this week
There's a summit on "Toilet Technique"
Stick your arse in the air
Squeeze your cheeks if you dare
And let's see a huge big fat keek
Susan Hunter Campbell
In Belfast for two days this week
There's a summit on "Toilet Technique"
They inspect your poo
To see what’s gone through
And give you a tick on each cheek!Richard Hunter CampbellIn Belfast for two days this week
There's a summit on "Toilet Technique”
With plenty of lectures
On fecal conjectures
And the joys of taking a leak. Isla "St Clair"In Belfast for two days this week
There's a summit on "Toilet Technique
But folks please beware
George Michael'll be there!!
So be careful or he'll have a peek!! Sandra McConnellIn Belfast for two days this week
There's a summit on "Toilet Technique”
Talk of the John
Those farts that pong
And poos that are shiny and sleek.Isla "St Clair"In Belfast for two days this week
There's a summit on "Toilet Technique"
I walk in the stall,
I Slip n fall
And end up with two wet cheeksWalker in CanadaLisa in New Zealand also entered but begged me not to publish her entry!!!Scores will follow shortly - The adjudicator is counting up the points!!!
Labels: clair gunning stitt, limericks, Lisa, Susan
Wee joke...
Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing. He concludes by saying: "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed in an accident'
OH NO!" the President exclaims. "That's terrible!"
His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the president sits, head in hands Finally, the President looks up and asks..........
''How many is a Brazillion ??!'
Labels: Joke
My own submission....
In Belfast for two days this week There's a summit on "Toilet Technique"The "highlights" compriseof a mystery prize for the Waterfront's best Winning Streak!!!
Wednesday's 10am quiz
Yesterday I promised you a very special quiz.
Well here it is...
Complete this Limerick in your own style - I will rank my top 5 favourite and award points at my discretion.
Good luck!!
In Belfast for two days this week
There's a summit on "Toilet Technique"
Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah
Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah
Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah!!!
Time entries not needed today. I will publish THEM ALL!!!
Labels: limericks
If you haven't already done so,
Go to this link on Google Earth...
Tuesday's Answer
There are 6 pigs in the pig sty.Well done all of you - Scores to follow...
Groove Hunks...
Please vote in our poll on the Groove website on the subject of "Groove Hunks" Current members of "Groove" may not vote...
(Helpful Hint)
Wednesdays Quiz....
Tomorrow's quiz is going to be very different.....Tune in here at 10.00 am sharp for details. You won't be disappointed...
Tuesday's 10am Quizler
A hexagonal pig sty had a pig in each corner, five pigs ahead of each pig and a pig on each pig's tail. How many pigs were there in the pig sty?Remember, to answer, you send an e-mail to mark.mcguire@btinternet.com with the answer and then post a comment "I'm in" so I can log your time....
Click here to see why Northern Ireland is still very much an important player in the world of....
Labels: Northern Ireland
Scores after Monday's quiz
Lisa has 5Richard has 4Susan has 3Labels: Susan
A Few Changes!!
First change is that you can now see who's been on this site and when, how long they stayed and all that. Click on my visit counter to the right to see all this. Who knows you may even find it interesting.
Secondly visit my friend Isla on her new page
HEREThirdly fill in your answer to this week's burning question on the right...
And lastly
VOTE VOTE VOTE!!!
Answer to Monday's quizler
52 = Weeks in a Year
64 = Squares on a Chess Board
12 = Months in a Year
2 = Grooves on a Record
60 = Seconds in a Minute
Well done all of you!! Scores coming soon...
Charlie Dimmock
Are you a fan of Charlie Dimmock?? If so click here for an unbeatable offer.
Labels: Ed
Vote for me!!
By the way I need votes - I'm at number 7 and a few votes will sling me forward. If you all vote for me I'll put up a picture of a gorgeous man - CLICK HERE!!! (and just because you've voted for me at your work computer doesn't mean you can't do it at home as well!!!)
So Far
So Far....Lisa has 5 pointsRichard has 4 pointsSusan has 3 pointsAny one else???Labels: Susan
Monday's 10AM Puzzler
Morning everyone - Hopefully there will be no dramas this week which stop me from running normal quizler service...This week's prize is going to be smashing... By the way Byte's prize (an exciting lunch with me) will be claimed this week - I'm hoping for Wednesday - Byte are you free?? Does anyone else want to join us - I know there have been QUERIES.
Here's the question...
Below you can find 5 language equations. For example, 7 = D in a W refers to 7 = Days in a Week. Can you determine the answers? NO CHEATING ....
52 = W in a Y
64 = S on a C B
12 = M in a Y
2 = G on a R
60 = S in a M
Remember, to answer, you send an e-mail to mark.mcguire@btinternet.com with the answer and then post a comment "I'm in" so I can log your time....
Anyone??
Is this moving?? Wow!!
This putter costs £15,000!! Click here to see why!! (select "For Him" and then "Gadgets"
How to lose a guy in 10 days
I've been a naughty blogger this week. It's been really difficult to keep the stream of information flowing due to the circumstances of Fred's situation - however we're all better now.
I thought I would provide a quick guide to how to legally fire a person. This will be interesting to everyone - not just employers. This shows how quickly and efficiently you could be "elbowed" out and how you could also have a case right from the first time you hear you are being got rid.
An employer DOES have the facility to lose employees at any time and at any stage that he wants to so long as DUE PROCESS is carried out. If it isn't then he / she is a fool as there is no excuse in an employment tribuneral situation for that and the employee AUTOMATICALLY wins. Remember an employee who is made redundant has actually been DISMISSED in law and therefore there is no difference. It still has to all be handled extremely carefully and sensitively but there are foolproof ways to make it happen fairly painlessly.
Due process is very simple. It should take about two weeks to get through which would be a pain for any would be MD executioner but here is how it works.
Step 1 - Take all your employees into a meeting and tell them there will be redundancies unless they can think of a way to save money for the company. Inform them that volunteers are needed. This may only need to be the department that you are thinking of.
Step 2 - If none come forward then select your candidate not just based on last in first out but on specific duties and savings. Sometimes this is difficult - you must score them all on paper on the basis of time served, cost, attendance, reliability - so long as you can prove that you have SCORED them all you are fine.
Step 3 - Once you have selected your "Candidate / s" tell them that a reduncy discussion will take place at a certain time and date giving them time to bring in a witness for themselves. ALWAYS have a second member of management on the side of the employer as a witness for the conducting manager - if you don't you are leaving yourself wide open. THEY HAVE A LEGAL RIGHT to this witness and failure to grant them this is an automatic breach. In fact you should insist upon it.
Step 4 - Bring the candidate in at the time allotted and explain to them that they have been selected. Ask them to mull this over and come back to you in a few days with any objections. Remember at this time it's only a "proposal" and not final. You are not telling them they are redundant you are ASKING them to consider it at this stage. You should also point out how much money / garden leave (if applicable) and notice they will have to serve. Then you should give them this info in writing only as a notice of PROPOSAL - He / she is still not dismissed. Remember redundancy is still a DISMISSAL IN LAW. END OF MEETING - there will be tears anger etc - don't rise to it. Be pleasant but efficient and stay cool.
Step 5 - Arrange another meeting for another day.
Step 6 - Again with all your witnesses lined up on both sides bring the candidate in and inform them that the final decision has been made. If they are unhappy with this then they may APPEAL. Remember they are still not dismissed!! If they decide to do this then another meeting has to be set and they have top write their appeal down and send it to a higher up person in the company - eg MD or CEO. If they don't want this then they are now dismissed and you can send them a final letter informing them of your sad decision. If they want an appeal then go to step 7.
Step 7 - MD or CEO has a meeting at another date again with all witnesses in place and announces his decision. Sad day for all - get another letter out. He / she is then dismissed.
At this point the employee has been fully CONSULTED and treated in the fairest way (and more importantly legally). The employer has at this point carried out all the STATUTORY requirements. Soft soaping the candidate will help oil the wheels during this process and in a tribuneral (perish the thought) help the advisors to look favourably on the employer. For example a gesture of good will like a weeks extra wages thrown in or an official presentation - difficult as that may be.
My father is retired but he still sits on the NI Fair Employment Tribuneral. He says that cases get found in favour of employee on a nearly DAILY BASIS because the above 6 easy steps are not followed. That's a lot of legal fees, a lot of court clogging, a lot of wasted money and a lot of stress and unnecessary upset on both sides over something which looks to me to be very simple and straightforward.
The Party's Over Guys...
Final Leader board for week and clear winner....
JR = 19
Darran = 9
Richard = 9Byte = 6
Susan = 3Andrew = 1Labels: Susan
This May Day bank Holiday some of us got together in my apartment and had a meal and party as we were all off on holidays. We all got absolutely hammered (a UK phrase meaning exceptionally drunk) and you can see pictures of this
EVENT HERE.
However something exciting you perhaps have not been introduced to is a recording of some MUSIC we decided to make on this day. Being a bunch of professional singers, we thought we should do a little recording - drunk.
Click here for the results - You may have to right click and "save as" - Richard your counter tenor voice is astonishing.....
Thursday's Answer
Mars = 4p
Snickers = 23p
Curly Wurly = 13p
Thursday's puzzler (a day late)
At the Sandy Row Costcutter, three chocolate bars are on special offer. A Mars, a Snickers and a Curly Wurly together cost 40p. A Curly Wurly is over three times the price of a Mars. Six Mars are worth more than a Snickers. A Curly Wurly, plus two Mars costs less than a Snickers. Can you determine the price of each type of sweet?
Ever wanted to know what Our Richard looks like?
Look no further than HERE
Apologies
There was no quiz today. That was due to us fighting our battle with Fred's employers and having to attend a solicitors meeting and what not.
To cut a long story short the employers caved and offered a much more satisfactory proposal.
Fred is happy and so am I.
Thanks for all your kind messages etc - and if you know of jobs going let us know!! We have two months buying time...
M XX
You by now are very familiar with Richard's Organ.
Or so you thought. However by popular demand (I have been INUNDATED by QUERIES) I am now able to let you hear
the first properly recorded sample of music, played by Richard on Richard's Organ. You may need to save this file first and then play it - I can't get it to work this time for some reason even though I saved it as a WMA.
As if THAT WERE NOT ENOUGH, I am also able to bring you photo's of his organ which are included here.
Richard may feel the need to say more himself about this all in a comment - I JUST DON'T KNOW.
M X
Message from Our Alan
Hi
Mark. Sorry
I hav
en
't had a chance to look at u
r site the last few days. Busy busy. Really sorry to hear bout robert. Jus se
nt him a text. I
'm sure all will work out. Best of luck.
Alan
C (btw, got into chamber choir!!- one of 8 basses in the whole uni. So pleased although not happy bout the 3 hour rehearsal tonite.) Take care
Labels: Alan C
Wednesday's Answer
120 times: don't forget rooms 440-449.
You may remember me reporting to you exclusively that Richard was having a 4 manual ORGAN installed in one of his upstairs bedrooms.
Well the installation is complete and it is now WORKING and he is PLAYING it on a nightly basis.
If you wish to hear Richard PLAYING his organ, please save
THIS FILE by right clicking and you can hear him at your BECK and CALL.
Wednesday's quizler
Nick Le Cars of Sandy Row did such a good job of the murals, he was asked to paint the room numbers on all of the doors of the fourth floor of the Europa.. He painted all of the numbers from 400 to 499. How many times did he paint the number 4?
Now I know I've banged on about this girl before but I really want you all to go and visit her page
HERE - She has listed Fred's as one of her "daily reads" - imagine - our wee humble website a daily read!!
What I love about that is :
a) She is a highly intelligent and creative writer (
read this story in particular and imagine that life with your partner across the world and I defy you not to gulp)
b) She's in New Zealand!! So it's not only a new friend but in a new country as well and the farthest away country I can think of!! Now I do appreciate that New Zealand is not remote and that the way the world map is laid out just makes it look like it is, and I know that it's daft to think of it as being worlds apart but the fact remains that it's so bloody far away from where I am sitting and yet I can communicate with someone in New Zealand!!!
Lisa thank you for making me a daily read and I'm so sorry if any of the above is in any way ridiculous to you (or God forbid offensive) and we'll all visit you often if only on a figurative platform!!
That's got me thinking - What about a visit to Christchurch Cathedral NZ instead of Christ Church Cathedral Oxford!! (Lisa we are all going to Christ Church Oxford next year)
Anyway that's quite enough babbling from me....
M
Labels: Lisa, New Year
The Pits
OK so today was not the best fun I've ever had in my life.
I can't really say why either on a public forum - suffice it to say that Fred is being treated extremely badly by the firm making him redundant and we are going to have to take action. Robert is extremely upset not only by this decision but by the firm's subsequent actions and handling.
Anyway a mess and not something we particularly need esp in light of all our other crap going on.
Thanks to all of you who have texted or e-mailed me and Fred - we really appreciate it. Fred is fine and I think has gone from upset to angry and has now got a bit of fight in him so don't worry about him. I am needless to say nearly shaking with rage. It's true that when someone you care about is hurting you feel it harder for them than you would if it were happening to you. I need to reign myself in - He's calmer than I am!!
Anyway contributions needed to cheer me up - off you go please. Pictures included - anything at all in fact. M XX
Tuesday's Answer
6: the number of letters each month has starting with January, therefore August has 6 letters. Results to follow...
Tuesday's Quizler
What number comes next in this sequence:
7 8 5 5 3 4 4 ==?==
Leader Board So Far (as of Monday morning)
Byte = 5Jr = 4Darran = 3Richard = 2Andrew = 1
Groove
Could Jonny and Philip of Groove please go to the website, click on your links and add a comment which will become your biog on the site - I will copy and paste onto the main page. I have everyone else
ThankyouM
Answer to Monday's Quizler
175 miles: the total trip is 180 miles. On the first day he travelled 60 miles, leaving 120 miles. On day two he travelled another 60 miles, leaving 60 miles. On day three he travelled 40 miles, leaving 20 miles. On day four he travelled 15 miles, leaving 5 miles. Wasn't that simple???
Viz Handy Hints - Submitted by Isla.... Don't blame me
Viz Top Tips
BANGING two pistachio nutshells together gives the impression that a very small horse is approaching.
DON'T waste money on expensive paper shredders to avoid having your identity stolen. Simply place a few dog poos in the bin bags along with your old bank statements.
MEN When listening to your favourite CD, simply turn up the sound to the volume you desire; then turn it down three notches. This will save your wife from having to do it.
GAMBLERS. For a new gambling opportunity, try sending £50 to yourself by Royal Mail.
BLIND PEOPLE Give yourself at least a chance of seeing something by not wearing heavy dark glasses all the time.
DRIVERS. If a car breaks down or stalls in front of you, beep your horn and wave your arms frantically. This should help the car start and send them on their way.
DEPRESSED people Instead of attempting suicide as a 'cry for help', simply shout 'Help!' thus saving money on paracetamol, etc.
MOTORISTS Avoid getting prosecuted for using your phone whilst driving. Simply pop your mobile inside a large shell and the police will think you are listening to the sea.
JEREMY Beadle When selling DVDs on your TV advert, hold the disks in your bigger hand so that they do not appear to be the size of laser disks
SINGLE men Convince people that you have a girlfriend by standing outside Etam with several bags of shopping, looking at your watch and occasionally glancing inside.
EMPLOYEES - Have all your poos at work. Not only will you save money on toilet paper, but you'll also be getting paid for it.
SCROOGES - Save money at Christmas by returning last year's cards to the sender, with the simple inscription "Same to you".
ADVENTUROUS LOVERS - Sprinkle talcum powder on each other's bottoms, then lie on the floor and break wind up in the air to send each other sexy 'bum-smoke signals' across the bedroom.
Would you like to go to the Oscars in America?? There is a draw happeng today for free seats
Click this link today!!
A picture to commemorate that NI win ....
Mondays Quizler
A man drove from Donegall to Cork. On the first day he travelled 1/3 of the distance. On day two he travelled 1/2 of the remaining distance. On day three he travelled 2/3 of the remaining distance. On day four, after covering 3/4 of the remaining distance, he was still 5 miles away from Cork. How many miles had he covered so far?
Comment should be raised with "I'm in" or something.
Sorry I'm late today!!
Redundancy at FredandFred
Other Fred was made redundant today. Not good. He's a bit upset.
Anyway if anyone knows of anyone looking for employees in any regard please let us know. What a gloomy Monday....
Vote
By the way guys there is a whole new week of voting ahead of you - the thing was reset on Sunday so if you think you have voted before you haven't so vote today again please. We are at number 3 at the moment....
Monday Morning
It's Monday morning and I'm starting a new week of diet. I have lost three pounds but over about 4 weeks. Now it's time to really get cracking.I've put this up as I found it helpful - it's nicked off a diet site so no I didn't type it all out - I'm not that sad... Workplace Diet Traps |
Oh, the diet traps that can catch even the best-intentioned dieter when she enters the workplace: the bowl of sweets on the receptionist's desk, the vending machine in the coffee area and the weekly let's-all-go-to-lunch-at-the-pizza-palace bash are just some of the obstacles!
But before you succumb to Monday cake, arm yourself with our tips for office workers:
1. Pack it up - lunch, that is. Avoid the no-time-in-the-morning excuse by preparing a lunch that’s on your diet plan the night before. Staying on your diet will be much easier if you have a "green light" lunch ready to eat at noon. Bonus: you’ll save money (let’s face it: all those restaurant meals can add up and damage your wallet as much as your waist!) and save time. With that extra dosh and time, you can…
2. Make room for exercise during the day! For example, if you invest in a pedometer (using that money you saved by eating a lunch brought from home) and eat lunch at work, you’ll have time to go for a walk or to the park to exercise. Enlist your co-workers and friends on your daytime-exercise rounds.
3. Feeling stressed? The bad news about stress: it can make you crave carbs, especially the sweet kind. You bite into a sugary treat and feel (temporarily) calmed, pleasantly distracted from the cause of your stress, whether it’s your boss’s anger about a missed deadline or a colleague’s temper tantrum over his lost client. Quick, take a hike (literally!). Go for a walk outside if you can, or think up a reason to walk to a different area of the office. Just standing up and moving can improve your spirits (and burn calories). Breathe deeply, swing your arms and focus on something to look forward to after work (NOT food-related).
4. Snack smart. Don’t play games with yourself by trying to "save" calories, thinking that you can bank them and then enjoy a big dinner. What is most likely to happen: you’ll be so hungry when you get home that all your good intentions will vanish - and you’ll find yourself in Temptation City. Instead, plan your mid-morning and mid-afternoon snack times the night before, so you can take them with you in the morning. If you’re counting calories, you might want to take a mini-bag of carrots and a piece of lower-fat cheese for a morning break, and half an apple spread with a tablespoon of peanut butter for an afternoon break.
My Weekend
Friday night I had Karin, Fabian and Sara round to the apartment - hadn't seen Karin in ages and it was great to see them all. Karin is from Switzerland and she brought her family over with her to Northern Ireland about three years ago. Since then they have all found schools and new lives. It was good to catch up with Karin. I got far too drunk and played a playstation game involving singing into a microphone.... V embarrassing.
Sat was a wedding to sing at (see this link) and Sat night went for a chinese with Richard and Susan. Richard's new organ has now been installed and he has promised us all some information which you are no doubt dying for. I played the theme from the Muppets for them on Richard's Organ - they liked that.
Sunday was the usual day of singing - Jonny performed a bass solo in the afternoon with the anthem "Lord thou hast been our refuge" and a very good job he did too.
Other than that weekend quiet and fairly uninteresting to read about I realise so to make it more interesting here is a picture of a lot of ants trying to move an egg yoke.....
Labels: Northern Ireland, photos, Susan
you will remember I recommended Google Earth to you the other day. Anyone who did download this superb thing should now go
HERE and download the tour of Venice - It's fab.
New stuff on other sites
There is a new post on the
St George's Website.Also there is now a new
"Groove" website HERE
Feedback Welcome!!
M XX
Scores on the Doors (final) for this week - Our Winner!!!
Jonny Diageo = 15 pointsByte = 13 pointsADMS Orchestra = 12 points
Gina = 7 pointsSusan = 5darran = 4
Lisa = 3 Points
Richard Northern Whig = 1 PointSo Jonny from Diageo wins again this week - that's two weeks in a row. Byte loses by two points and poor Andrew who is obviously under par due to his cold comes third with 12.So what is Jonny's prize ???Find out very very soon......Labels: Susan
Just cos I felt like it
(Click picture for more like this)
Friday's "Did You Know...."
It once was law to say "God bless you" to one who sneezed
During the 6th Century, it was customary to congratulate people who sneezed because it was thought that they were expelling evil from their bodies. During the great plague of Europe, the Pope passed a law to say "God bless you" to one who sneezed.
There still are some weird laws on the books. In Washington state, it is against the law to boast that one's parents are rich. In Maryland, it's illegal to play Randy Newman's "Short People" on the radio. In Alabama it is illegal to play Dominoes on Sunday. And in Minneapolis, double-parkers can be put on a chain gang.
An old statute in Kentucky states that men who push their wives out of bed for inflicting their cold toes on them can be fined or jailed for a week. A 100-year-old law in Willowdale, Oregon makes it illegal to swear during sex. An odd law in Minnesota makes it illegal to hang male and female underwear on the same washing line. In Melbourne, Australia it is illegal for men to parade in strapless dresses - but they are allowed to cross-dress in anything with sleeves.
An old law in Russia allows a police officer to "beat a peeping tom soundly." In Texas, two categories of men are exempt from peeping tom charges: men over 50 and men with only one eye.
In Normal, Oklahoma you could be sent to prison for "making an ugly face at a dog."
And if you're in Hawaii and laughing at these odd laws, stop! In Hawaii it is forbidden to laugh after 10pm.
Friday's Answer
There are 64 hexagons in total. There are 37 single hexagons, 19 hexagons which contain 7 smaller hexagons, 7 hexagons which contain 19 hexagons and one large hexagon which contains all smaller hexagons.
Andrew Smith
Big hello to Andrew who is still not well. Andrew we miss you get well soon
A Sermon on All Things Irritating
I'm a fairly happy go lucky guy. I like my friends. The top layer of my personality, the crispy crunchy sugar coated outer shell, is basically very simple : I like to please people.
However those who know me, who really know me, know that I am very easily irritated. I am not so sure that I am that different in this respect. We all have our little "things" that displease us. The most unfair thing is that these "things" can be tolerated in some people but not in others. For example if there is someone in your life who irritates you greatly then these "things" can be magnified to the power of 1000.
My personal thing (or one of them) is unrequested physical contact. Now don't get me wrong - I am not some physical retard who never had a hug as a child and who lives life wearing white gloves not touching door-knobs - quite the reverse. I love a good hug. I love physical contact with people I love. I had the greatest hug ever last night with a really good friend and that feels great.
But unrequested sudden jumpy physical contact is a whole different matter. It makes my skin crawl and the worst thing about it is the fact that you usually have to smile through it and not display your irritation for social reasons. Having, say, someone poke you unexpectedly in the sides, or put the back of their hand to your face to show you how cold it is outside, or wake you out of your sleep by pressing a cold beer can against your nipple - that sort of thing....
Therefore my sermon to you all is that in future, now that I have established that I am generally a lovely person who wants to please everyone around me, and now that I have laid out the ground rules about my small "thing" ; please don't look at me in open mouthed wonder and amazement if I flip my lid and act in a completely unreasonable manner when man-handled or tweaked. From now on social reasons will not preclude me from turning green and ripping my shirt open....
Friday's Puzzler - The Final!!!
How many hexagons, in total, can you find in this puzzle. Clue: there are more than 45.
place a comment saying "I'm In" or something for time of answer recording
I found this photo on the internet on another Blog - any Barcelonalytes should visit it to receive an instant nostalgic glow...
Further to this I found (by the same lady) more photo's of Barcelona
HERE on her website.
Take a trip - you won't regret it...
M XX
Labels: barcelona, photos
Thursday's Did you know....
Cows don't have upper front teeth
Although a cow has no upper front teeth, it grazes up to 8 hours a day, taking in about 45 kg (100 lb) of feed and the equivalent of a bath tub full of water. A healthy cow gives about 200,000 glasses of milk in her lifetime.
A cow has four stomachs: the rumen, reticulum, omasum and abomasum. The rumen is the largest stomach and acts as a fermentation chamber. The abomasum is last of the four and is comparable in both structure and function to the human stomach.
With all its grazing and many stomachs, it is no wonder that cows are one of the main contributors to the hole in the ozone layer. Apart from CFC, the biggest culprit is hydrocarbon emissions from cars and cows. Yes, cows! Cows release some 100 million tons of hydrocarbon annually - by releasing gas. To give you an idea of how much gas a cow emits: if the gas of 10 cows could be captured, it would provide heating for a small house for a year.
But unlike what you think, cows release hydrocarbon mostly by burping.
Answer to Thursday's Quizler
The entrants finished as follows:Ivor
Shoulder-Chip Al Beback
Inga Hootz
Leigh Vamessage
May Eye
Nick
Le-Cars Laura DeLand
Sandy Row Isa Steek Harold Lawad
It was the lesbians what done it (stolen from PopBitch)
Is George Bush's negligence at all to blame
for the Hurricane Katrina debacle? Not if
you ask one of Bush's richest religious
conservative backers, the Rev Pat Robertson.
According to Robertson, it's all the fault
of... lesbians.
"This is the second time in a row that God has
invoked a disaster shortly before lesbian
Ellen Degeneres hosted the Emmy Awards," said
Pat. "Is it any surprise that the Almighty
chose to strike at Miss Degeneres' hometown?
... God already allows one awards show to
promote the homosexual agenda. But clearly
He will not tolerate such sinful behavior to
spread beyond the Tonys."
The loon also claims that it's no coincidence
that the Iraq insurgency started in September
2003. It's because Ellen's TV talk show
started that month.
Robertson tried to get elected President
in 1988. He said he'd only stand against
George Bush Snr if three million people
signed up to back his bid. Rather
disturbingly, they did.
More insanity:
http://www.patrobertson.com/
Fred and Freds Site Stats. You Like Me - You Really Like Me!!
-- Site Summary ---
Visits
Total ........................ 1,043
Average per Day ................. 41
Average Visit Length .......... 6:21
This Week ...................... 289
Page Views
Total ........................ 2,551
Average per Day ................. 93
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This Week ...................... 652
Thursday's Ten O'clock Puzzler
Answer coming at 3!!! So far Jonny from Diageo is correct = 5 points and Darran from Cork has 4 points!! Anyone else or are you all too confused??At the recent Sandy Row Mixed Community National Hurdle trials, ten contestants competed for the coveted Greater Unionist Battalion Shield. (GUB Shield) There were numerous judges who made sure that the results were accurate, from their notes can you determine who finished where? Ivor Shoulder-Chip finished before May Eye and Nick Le-Cars whilst Leigh Vamessage was victorious over May Eye and Laura DeLand. Harold Lawad was beaten by Isa Steek, Nick Le-Cars and Al Beback. Laura DeLand was beaten by Nick Le-Cars, May Eye and Ivor Shoulder-Chip, whereas Sandy Row beat Isa Steek and Harold Lawad but lost to Laura DeLand and Inga Hootz. Leigh Vamessage was beaten by Ivor Shoulder-Chip and Inga Hootz. Inga Hootz was beaten by Al Beback, who, in turn, lost to Ivor Shoulder-Chip, but beat Isa Steek and Harold Lawad. May Eye finished ahead of Nick Le-Cars and Isa Steek, who lost to Leigh Vamessage and Inga Hootz.
Off You Go - Answers to mark.mcguire@btinternet.complace a comment saying "I'm In" or something for time of answer recording
Did you know - from Lisa in NZ!!
Lisa said: But of course you can move down here to New Zealand, we have lots of immigrants from your way here.
Did You Know?...you have to learn how to do the haka first before you can set first on my island?Lisa further added : Good Heavens! Who's GORGEOUS country is THAT??! Oh yeah, it's mine lolThe haka is a maori tribal 'chant/dance' that lays down a challenge of sorts to the 'enemy' or opponent. If you know who the All Blacks are (that's assuming you follow rugby in Ireland, and don't tell me you don't, cos I've watched us play against the Irish)...then you would have seen the Haka. Our team performs it on the field, after the national anthems are played, and right before the kick off whistle goes.Does that help? lolCool map by the way. And thanks for your comment on my post yesterday...I appreciated it a lot. :)) --Posted by Lisa to fredandfreds at 9/15/2005 11:23:46 AM Labels: Lisa
I felt it only appropriate that the world exclusive trailer of Richard and Susan getting married should be hosted HERE!!
ON FredAndFred's!!!
This video has been literally years in the making but is nearly ready and
HERE IS A TASTER!!Enjoy the video...
Fred
Labels: Susan, video
Would you like to run a website??
It is possible to open up Fredandfred into a place where other people can put up posts as well. Real posts with pictures etc. Would you like that?? I don't know if you would - the responsibility is great and the audience can be very demanding at times (and very quiet at others)
I'll put it to a vote shall I?? Any thoughts???
Fred
Wednesday's "Did you know...."
One in every Ten People Live on an Island!!!
The largest island in the world is Greenland. Australia is considered a continent because it has unique plant and animal life. Antarctica also is a continent - larger than Europe and Australia. Greenland, although quite big, shares the habitat features of Northern America.
The smallest island in the world - according to the Guiness Book of Records - is Bishop Rock. It lies at the most south-westerly part of the United Kingdom. It is one of 1040 islands around Britain and only has a lighthouse on it. In 1861, the British government set out the parameters for classifying an island. It was decided that if it was inhabited, the size was immaterial. However, if it was uninhabited, it had to be "the summer's pasturage of at least one sheep" - which is about two acres.
 A lot of standing room - not much else. This is Bishop Rock, the world's smallest island. |
Going by the above parameters, most of the 179 584 "islands" around Finland and the almost 200 000 around Canada would not match Indonesia as the country with the most islands. In fact, Indonesia consists only of islands - 13 667 of them, 6000 of which are inhabited.
The remotest uninhabited island is Bouvet Island in the South Atlantic. The remotest inhabited island in the world is Tristan da Cunha. It is in the South Atlantic, 2575 km (1600 miles) south of St Helena, which is an island a few hundred kilometres (miles) off the coast of South Africa. Tristan da Cunha has no TV but it has one radio station. The population totals 242 and they only have 7 surnames (last names) between them, so they are all related. Tristan da Cunha does have a capital, called Edinburgh of the South Seas.
The smallest independent island country is the Pacific island of Nauru. It measures 21,28 sq km (8.2 sq mi). (Only the Vatican City and Monaco are smaller countries.)
Of the 6 billion+ people in the world, one out of ten lives on an island (600 million). Which is not so hard to imagine when you consider that more than 200 million people live in Indonesia alone - and some 60 million live in Britain, the only island connected to a continent (through the Chunnel).
Answer to Wednesday's Quizler
The letter was written on a typewriter which has a problem with the top row of letters - they did not print. The letter should have read:
Dear Sir,
I would like to complain about the top row of my typewriter.
These letters appear not to work correctly.
As you can see, these letters are missing from this document.
I would be very grateful if you could correct this problem forthwith.
Many thanks.
Mrs Makeyup.
This site guides you through some of the worst mistakes you can make if you are going to Japan on business and need to brush up on your etiquette.I think these styles should be adopted in certain alter-related situations that can be tricky for even a seasoned Sunday morning worshipper... Next week - "How to say a-men"
But It's not all violence here...
But looking on the bright side....Congratulations to Andrew and the guys at the Ulster Orchestra for their success (again) at the Proms in the Park. A fab night in Belfast (and not a petrol bomb in sight....)Click Here for More InfoLabels: Northern Ireland
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/northern_ireland/4243652.stmFabulous. This will calm them all down. Not....Lisa could I move over to New Zealand with you???Labels: Lisa, Northern Ireland
Wednesday's Ten O'clock Quizler
Customer services at FredandFred received the following letter recently. Luckily one of our "Fred Support Agents" were able to determine the meaning and help Mrs Makeyup. Can you work it out what her problem was?
Da S,
ld lk cmlan ab h f m .
hs ls aa n k ccl.
As can s, hs ls a mssng fm hs dcmn.
ld b v gafl f cld cc hs blm fhh.
Man hanks.
Ms Mak.
Andrew - I found this on the BBC Website and thought of you. Andrew has two cats of his own - "The Girls" as he calls them. He also indulges in cat photo gazing with his colleagues at the Ulster Orchestra.
This photo is one of the finalists you can vote for at
The BBC Photographer of the year CompetitionLabels: photos
For no other reason other than I can....
Our Fred's Vocal Debut
Now our Fred doesn't say much as you maybe know. He stays fairly quiet in most instances leaving me to do all the verbal hot air ballooning. That works well because I have a notion I'm quite good at it and most people have a notion they are more than happy to LET me think I am good at it. Certainly that's Fred's mentality.
However Fred has graciously flown down from his lofty platform in "Silent Mountain" to give us a guest vocal in an exclusive Mark McGuire Singers number. Yes!! A Guest vocalist. Take it away Fred and Fred!!
CLICK HERE TO BE THE FIRST TO HEAR IT.
Scores as of Tuesday afternoon
Scores for Tuesday's Tricky one were...Byte got 5 points
ADMS got 4 points.Andrew I have to tell you off at this point. I received your e-mail but had there been other competitors you would have not scored any points as you forgot to say "I'm in". As I received your e-mail and there were no other competitors then I will ON THIS OCCASION ONLY accept your answer.In future an answer is only valid if you make a comment to let me know what time you answered. This is the only fair way to judge the order of answers due to fallibility of e-mail servers in terms of time. I'm not picking on you - this goes for the rest of you.So overall then for week points are as follows:Byte = 10 pointsADMS Orchestra = 5 pointsGina = 4 points
Lisa = 3 Points
Jonny Diageo = 2 points
Richard Northern Whig = 1 PointCOME ON guys - we can't have the elusive "Byte" winning this week also can we? (Or can we????!!!.....)
Urgent Recall
Did You Know
The largest desert in the world is Antarctica.
Alan Campbell
Alan in Edinburgh in my apartmentAlan in Edinburgh has joined us and answered our wee quiz!! And....
A message from Alan!!!
Hi everyone. My email isnt working in my room yet so here's jus a quick update! Edinburgh is class. Havn't pulled yet unfortunately (school disco tonight so fingers crossed!) Loads to do tho... Think I may have alcohol poisoning. I kinda miss Belfast!!
Alan great to hear from you how the hell are you we all miss you don't we guys??? Leave your messages for Alan below... M
Seeeeoooosan said...
Hi Alan, hope you are settling in well and have found some nice 'wee bird' to keep you company. Will send you a text but keep in touch
said...
Alan,I hope you're doing well. Tell me about you're flat mates and did you pull that girl on Saturday. Chamber choir bass section is hilarious. Cu soon , JR
Richard said... Hi Alan,Glad to hear your settling in. You're not missing much here.......chamber choir bass section IS hilarious!! Keep in touch. Send an email when you get connected.R
Seuuuuusan said... Alan - even funnier is the bass section in Grooove!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
said... Susan, Thin ice- the bass section in groove is a blend of youth and experience (and Richard!!)
Seeeoooosan said...
It is also a blend of good looks and ginger hair!! (Richard will kill me for this!)
Jonny Roberts said...
May I just take this opportunity Richard to thank your wife for her kind words but also to remind her of her wedding vows and her devotion to her loving husband.
Labels: Susan
Answer to Tuesday's Puzzler
You ask one of the individuals what the other one would say if you asked him which door is holding back the hungry lion and then open this door. Easy wasn't it!!Congratulations to all that got it right. Leader board to follow!!!
Did you know??
Did you know is my new daily feature. I'm going to post a "Did You Know??" EVERY DAY from now on!!I would love it if you would also post a "Did You Know" on the comments section and any good ones will be posted on the main page for literally THE WORLD to see!!The first FREDANDFREDS "Did You Know" will appear here at 4 o'clock GMT.Don't miss it!!!Fred. XX
Jordan and some "Bingo Caller" - ring the taste police now....
Mondays Puzzler - Results
Byte = 5 pointsGina = 4 pointsLisa = 3 PointsJonny Diageo = 2 pointsRichard Northern Whig = 1 PointThe answer was of course Corn on the Cob but I accepted Chicken as well...
Tuesday's Puzzler
You are in a room with 2 doors leading out. Behind 1 door is a coffer overflowing with jewels and gold, along with an exit. Behind the other door is an enormous, hungry lion that will pounce on anyone opening the door. You do not know which door leads to the treasure and exit, and which door leads to the lion. In the room you are in are 2 individuals. The first is a knight, who always tells the truth, and a knave, who always lies. Both of these individuals know what is behind each door. You do not know which individual is the knight, or which one is the knave. You may ask one of the individuals exactly 1 question. What should you ask in order to be certain that you will open the door with the coffer behind it, instead of the hungry lion?Answers to mark.mcguire@btinternet.comLeave a comment "I'm in" for order of pointsUpdate - 11.25amByte is rightAndrew is rightANYONE ELSE??
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Alan in Edinburgh in my apartment
