Guest writer Andrew Smith's mid week rant....
Andy has got to go. Why do we have to take any more mediocrity sexed up with a hard luck story?Brenda is the only decent singer left. The tabloid press are already whipping up a thinly veiled racist, mysogenist attack. "Bad Mum" they have labled her.
So if not Brenda, who's left?
Journey South: Don't laugh but they could win. They would give some credibility to a show that's, let's face it, a total replica of "New Faces" from the early 70s. "Ooh look, one of those boys plays a guitar, just like in a band! Ooh how real! how unreconstructed!"
The Conway Sisters: We had them 20 years ago. They were called the Nolan Sisters. They featured every week on the Two Ronnies. They could sing in tune. Oh yeah and actually we have them now too, they're called the Corrs. True the Conways proved they had a bit of spunk when they decided to ignore the advice of their 'mentor' Simon Cowell, but really girls, do you think the world of pop is crying out for you?
The Colon Sisters - A mixture between the Corrs and the Nolans only Andrew feels they have some "spunk"
Andy : If the point of the show is to pluck a decent karaoke singer from obscurity and give him five minutes of fame before sending him back to PAs in pubs along the south coast, then Andy's your man. Remember Steve from last year?
Chico: End of the pier or Butlins.
Shayne: For a start that's not really a proper name, and that's certainly not the way you spell it. He is pretty, and I'm sure he'd do whatever you wanted in a casting couch type of way to secure that first record deal. But really he's just Gareth Gates mk II without the disabled mouth. In fact he has no sympathy-inducing handicap, unless you count the two pierced ears he sported early on in the competition with those ridiculously large Beckham-esque diamondique studs.
Labels: New Year
posted by Freddy @ Wednesday, November 23, 2005
Comments: 5
